An Overdue Update

Hello folks,

How are you? I hope that you all are finding yourself in good spirits now that the end of summer is official and we travel into fall.

I wanted to address the slow down, and all-out stop, of posts here lately - though, it may be more for myself. As an avid blog reader and tumblr addict, I feel confused when a fave goes AWOL so I wouldn't want to repeat those patterns.

In the past two months I have moved, made big changes in important relationships, turned 25 and suffered what many call a 'quarter life crisis.' From my observation, it is not uncommon - but OHMYMY does it feel like a ton of bricks hitting your chest: THE FUTURE. IT'S UP TO YOU. WHADDYA GUNNA DO OHMYGOD.

This year was a wonderful adventure of hoop events, farmer's markets, workshops, classes, new skills, discoveries and endless travel. Everything was so exciting. But, after it died down I was left to ask myself - well, what now?

I came to realize that as much as I absolutely love hooping and will never leave this passion, I am looking for something new. I got to explore it to it's fullest, had days where I hooped for 5 or 6 hours; Recorded. Watched. Learned. Now though, I want to learn something new. I want a job. A career?

It's a scary thought for me - and I would guess, many - in this ... sluggish...job market. But it is something of which I am sure.

So in the past few weeks I have been thinking about the future. Now I am exploring it.

...and struggling with insomnia.

I am not abandoning this blog - but I am not going to fill it with fluff. I plan on continuing in the hoop world and will update when events come up and videos or pictures inspire.

Thanks so much for listening. Keep hooping, guys!

-Kym

The Circular Constant

Do you ever feel like you are going crazy when you haven't hooped for awhile? Okay - full disclosure - I feel like I am going crazy most of the time, but it is much more pronounced when I am living sans hoop.  Yes, I think the exercise aspect of hooping impacts the sense of calm I have post spin session - but even when it is only 5-10 minutes I feel worlds better. My conclusion is that this sense of happiness is  from having the reminder that something that exists purely for joy does exist in life (or, in my life.)

So many 'happy' things come with side-effects that make them impermanent additions in life. Heck, even going to the gym (way back when) was something that was 'good' for me and made me happy, but eventually left me with swollen, sore knees and joints and, of course, that often felt gym boredom. I knew it wouldn't be forever. 

Particularly at this time in my life - at twenty five, when the future is confusing and ever pressing, and I feel undeniably grown up, yet not very good at it - it is a blessing to have one thing that I am assured will be a constant in my life. Yes, it's a hula-hoop - but it is something that assures me that I will move forever, be active and learning forever and be able to find a sense of peace within myself despite the rest of life. 

from a brief but oh-so therapeutic hoop session yesterday.

It seems clear that many, many new folks are stumbling into this hoop world of ours - and whether or 

not they will feel the way I do about it (or it will instead be a rather depressing 'thinspo' fad...grumble) remains to be seen, but I hope that it is. Finding constants in anything - people, places, interests, professions - is difficult. Being the control-happy young and confused gal I am, I am glad I found one. 

Moving Day Ramblings

Somehow, I swear, the number of hoops I have has multiplied. 

I am packing up all my belongings today, schlepping them to the car, and preparing for the real start of the moving process later tonight. There is never a good place for hoops during times like these. Which, is why I will be having a MONDO-SUPER-MEGA-GIANT sale at the West End Farmer's Market this weekend with ridiculous prices on new and used hoops. Please, if you are local - stop by! It's in Alexandria, VA and all the directions and contact info can be found HERE. This Sunday from 10-1pm. I'll be hooping to calm my sore muscles from tonight and tomorrow's heavy lifting. I feel sort of crazy working the market during the weekend of the move - but I plan on riding the momentum all the way until Monday evening. Whew!

... and this is BEFORE my friend drops off the 10 hoops I lent out last week. 

Seriously though...how has everything changed so fast? 

It's strange, really. For over two years I had been teaching at the same place where I started my first hoop class.  We had our final meeting this past Tuesday. Though I do think it was time to end (most hoop teachers set up 6 week sessions... I had simply started teaching and not stopped for... two years...), I'll admit that I got a bit misty eyed when I was driving away. It was my first real hoop opportunity and things would never have gone the way they did without it. I met so many wonderful, wonderful students and watched them go from novice's to hoop masters. Watching passion grow in someone is a tremendous experience. 

So what is the next step? 

Well, I plan on looking  for more teaching/hoop jam locations and expanding things on that front. Possibly more markets and workshops as well. It's really all thinking aloud at this point. I will have to get used to a new hoop space - though, I must say, we will finally live somewhere with ceilings taller than myself which will be a dream during those long winter hoop months. (And, really... in general.)

I have moved so many times. So, so many times. Finally I feel like I am moving into a home instead of into a space. Somewhere that I can get cozy and make my own - it is something that I feel is often taken for granted by folks who have lived in the same place for years or grown up in a home since they were little. I can't imagine that level of stability and am extremely grateful for the massive amount of experience I was able to get by living with so many different people and places - but, a bit of stability would be nice for a change. 

Particularly since, As usual, I am unsure of the exact path life has in store. But, I am still following my passions and moving forward each day. With each new opportunity I ask myself, 'does this get you closer to where you want to be or not' because it can often be deceiving. A short term benefit (i.e., money) can often times mask a greater loss (being 'trapped' on an unhappy path.) 

There will certainly be a lot of changes up and coming. But that is what life is all about, right? You don't get a practice run so there is no use in worrying about what could have gone better or been different. Learn. Listen to yourself, and continue to move forward. 

This move is a step in the right direction and I absolutely can't wait. 

As always, thanks for listening guys. Alright - back to the heavy lifting!

West End Farmers Market
4800 Brenman Park Drive
Alexandria, Virginia
22304

Sunday 9/4 10am-1pm

Seven Steps to Starting a Hoop Group

There is a great article on hooping.org today about how to begin your own hoop group! Lara Eastburn lists some great tips on how to get started, and what's important to keep the group growing and running smoothly.

Santa Monica Hoop Group via Flickr

I added a few more tips from my experience with hoop jams below the article. Organizing can be lots of work - but if you are hoping to meet, and make a few hoopers, there is no better way than getting a hoop group started.

Here is an excerpt from the list: 

Step 1: Get a Lay of the Land. Search through the regional forums here on hooping.org for hoopers in your area, just as new members do on Hooping.org every single day. There may or may not be a group that is close to you, but this is the place to start. If you come up empty-handed, then there is no better person to fill the need for a local hoop-group than you!

Step 2: Pick a Place and a Time, Bring Extra Hoops, and Be Consistent. Starting your own local hooping meetups can be as easy as showing up to your local park at the same time and day every week. Take a friend with you if you can, and let people know in your social networks where you’ll be. You may be alone the first time, and maybe even the second or third, but you WILL see the hooping magic happen. Don’t get discouraged. Many, if not most, established hoop jams started out in exactly this way. Your persistence will prevail.

Step 3: Embrace Your New Role as a Hooping Ambassador. Starting a hooping group will require a bit of bravery on your part. It can be hard to hoop alone in the middle of a public place. But tough it out, and you won’t be a solitary hooper for long. Remember that you’re doing what makes you happy and that your enthusiasm is infectious! Greet the curious with a smile, hand ‘em a hoop, and answer any questions they have as best you can. When you see that gleam in a newcomer’s eye that is the telltale sign they’ve caught the hoop-bug, ask for an email address or invite them to join you online for updates and reminders about your weekly hoop-gathering. Before you know it, that person tells their friends, who bring their friends, and you’ve got a full-fledged weekly hoop jam.

Step 4: Crank It Up. There’s no denying it – besides having extra hoops on-hand, MUSIC will be the second most important component of bringing the energy that will grow your hoop group and keep folks coming back for more. In the beginning, perhaps you huddle around a small battery-powered boombox. But as your group grows, you’ll feel the need for bigger sound and booty-shaking playlists. Luckily for you, Philo has some suggestions for HoopJam Sound Solutions right here.

Step 5: Don’t Drop the Ball. As your hoop group grows and evolves, so too will your responsibilities. You started this thing, and you will be the glue that holds it together. But don’t be afraid to ask for help in keeping it going. Make sure there is always someone there at the appointed time and place to get things started. Before weather becomes an issue, seek out alternative venues for rainy and cold days. Get creative. Churches, schools, community centers, music venues, dance and yoga studios are all places to look for indoor hooping space. Put out the call and see who answers. Read the rest of the list on hooping.org >>

All of these are excellent considerations to starting and running a hoop group, but there are a few more I would add. First, it's important to also consider what you want your role to be in the hoop group before you get started. 

If you are showing up as the head hooper each week and have some flight time under your belt, it's likely that folks seeing new moves will ask for some instruction. If one person tries, another is going to join in. Soon it will be just like a class! 

Teaching people new hoop moves is a blast, but, if you were hoping to get a place to jam with other hoopers, it can be tough to be in teacher mode the whole time - especially if the group is a free get together. Have a plan in place if you don't want to teach the whole time; as in, the first half hour is "free teach" for Q&A and instruction, but the last half hour is for free spin time. 

If it is in a park or school, it's also important to keep an eye on the kiddies. Some times they may not understand that the hoops are only to be borrowed, and I'v had hoops walk away from me more than once during larger jams. 

Anyone attending the group who is meaning rude, disrespectful or disruptive - don't hesitate to ask them to leave. In my experience, the only rude folks were the ones who were doing so out of embarrassment or anxiety - but that is no excuse to make the group feel uncomfortable.  It can be rough to ask someone to leave, especially when the event is so casual, but just asking them to please let the group operate in a friendly environment, as intended, can help. 

Asking for help keeping a look out for hoops from any regular hoopers and taking a minute at the start of the jam to go over basic ground rules can make jams run much more smoothly. If new folks walk up, introduce yourself and let them know what's up. 

Hoop jams can be a great time and a wonderful way to build a new community. With hard work, a great attitude, and dedication you never know how it will grow. If you start one up, remember have fun, be consistent, be you and happy hooping!

Time to Get Serious

That's it. It's time.

I have got to get back in the hoop. Many moons ago, thanks to the 30 Day Hoop Challenge, hooping became a daily habit. Sometimes it would be 20-30 minutes of boppin' around while others would turn into hours of inspiration and getting lost in the spin. It stayed that way for several months, with the daily practice being responsible for my most transformative hoop year. 

Then there was a break from routine - deadly for most parts of said routine. (Which is why, I love routine.)

After all the travel my body simply got used to missing some hoop days. With record high heat indexes here for the past week, I decided that skipping a few more days was probably in my best interest. 

Welp, I didn't die of heatstroke but - I. feel. awful. 

Okay, maybe 'awful' is strong - more correctly, I don't feel like me. Hooping daily is something that is wonderful for my body, yes, but much more importantly, the meditative, mind quieting movement keeps my head screwed on straight. 

... and now I feel like it's a little wobbly. 

Excuses not to practice are very often true and relevant. (Aren't those just 'reasons' then, Kym?) 

I was travelling. I will be again this week. I am about to move, and have several new projects in the works - but, really - being busy is exactly why hooping daily is so important. Feeling good makes every task feel so much easier to accomplish. 

This week I am starting a new goal of daily hoop practice (and reflection?) so that I may get back to the place where I thrive, both mentally and physically. 

I've missed ya, hoop. Glad to be back. 

Hoop Fest New England: Story Book

At Hoop Fest New England the adventure was your own to create. 

pictured: Bad ass. Maria Randolph.
Picture by Kim Nicoll

Maria's strong aesthetic eye (and talented husband) created a luminous wonderland in which to play, and her organizational skill ensured plenty of options of what to do - but most impressively, she created an atmosphere of total acceptance. Whether the goal was to attend every event, meet the community, network, and perform for a crowd, or - as was mine - to take a more distanced and unstructured approach to the event - it was warmly welcomed. Everyone was doing their own thing, together. 

A little hideaway of 60 or so hoopers, we all floated from our makeshift homes to workshops, events, the nearby beach or back into town as we saw fit. An unexpected consequence of my recent attendance at Hoop Path and general whirlwind hoop year was that I had already taken several of the workshops offered (see descriptions of Hoop Path here and Malcolm's workshop here.) However, I had never been to Maine, and rarely get to see my sister - so  instead of feeling awkward about not joining in all the time, I simply felt free to observe, snapping shots with the camera and then heading away from the crowd to hoop and frolic as desired.

There was something at being at the first Hoop Fest NE that gave everyone the attitude of 'let's make this great,' and extreme gratitude was an ever present attitude. Gratitude that there are others out there sharing this passion, attending these events, being inspired by the hoop - and gratitude that we were given a place to explore and expound on that singular passion. More than once I stood and looked at all these strangely dressed, laughing, happy people with hoops swinging and thought, "is this real?" Can this be real? And then I couldn't help but smile and laugh at the undeniable reality of it all.

The workshops were laid back and informative. Nothing was set up to be intense - it was more like a hoop buddy was coming over to show you something cool. Sennyo gave excellent tips on how to isolate the hoop, and Bex brought charisma and charm to a Pilates and ballet inspired lesson. Caroleena is a natural teacher and inspired everyone to add a bit of flamenco flair into their hoop dance with points, gazes and the creation of circles and lines with the body and the hoop. I took away something from every teacher, even if I knew the style didn't resonate with my own.

Sennyo

There was a clear message throughout:  'Do what you want. Experience what you will. Have fun and you belong.'

Hoop Fest was the world as it should be. It was a lovely experience that I look forward to growing and eventually being able to offer more events and classes for hoopers hungry for knowledge. Something dreadful happened on the way up to the event - my beloved poly pro split while sitting away from me on the train. I am unembarrassed to admit that I had to hold back tears when I saw what had happened, but - Hoop Fest was such a fun, free spirited and enchanting time that I found myself forgetting all about the accident once I became immersed in the event. That was the power of Hoop Fest - it was a time to stop sweating the small stuff. Unfurl the eyebrows. Smile and feel completely free. 

Hats off to everyone for creating the feeling for which we all yearn and allowing us to take some of it back with us. 

Decompressing in Boston, Visualizing Maine

Home from Hoop Fest, with a day off from technology in between arrival and updates. Transitioning from tent living to the 'watch instantly' world can be a difficult adjustment, one that I was both looking forward to immensely and dreading entirely. 

Currently, I am doing my favorite part of the process. Culling through all the captured images and  bookmarking memories for later entry. There are many, many pictures to follow and after that, of course, the words. 

So happy to be back XXOO

Hoop Path V: In Words

By far, the most popular post on this blog is "How Can I Follow My Passion if I Don't Know What it is?" That is likely partially due to the fact that is the first article listed under "popular" at the bottom of this page and it has a funny picture of Oprah next to it - but, I like to think it is also for another reason. It is a question not only I have wondered. 

This question ended up being my frame of reference this weekend at Hoop Path V. Friday afternoon, after orientation and discussion of the myth of hoop path  we stood up and began to sway. An established Hoop Path warm-up, 'sway' is where we move back and forth building and growing from the movement in whatever way we feel comfortable. The last time I had to do this activity was in '09 and I remember feeling so damn awkward the whole time. "Is this the right way to move?" "What is that person doing?" My body felt uncomfortably stiff - I could feel the tightness in my shoulder blades and the discomfort with possible eyes on me. But at HPV I just swayed. I listened to my body and not my mind. I was so isolated in my bubble of perception of the self that I simply did not notice nor care about anyone else in the room. 

Finally. 

Finally. My mind finally had let me be. 

This first four hours were the most grueling at Hoop Path and the class kept sitting down between the  4-5 minute songs, which surprised Bax a bit. Where he thought we were losing energy we were actually so intensely throwing ourselves into the dance that as soon as we could break we practically fell down.  It was a dark, loud sea of music and movement and I was finally able to be lost in it. No eyes mattered. The whole class could have been staring and I would have felt just as free. After this event, my hoop kindred spirit gave me the best compliment I could have ever hoped for, "When you hoop, Kym, you don't even notice what else is going on - you didn't even see anyone else in the room." 

I was able to go from zero to flow as soon as the music started. I was finally feeling confident.

Bax and Ann were the speakers of that first night, and where I credit Bax for helping me reach the state of mental calm that I did, Ann's lessons were the ones that have stuck with me. She explored 'wrapping' and 'tracing' with the hoop. The next time you are practicing with your hoop - try flailing your arms big and wide, throw them around your body, almost like you are giving yourself a hug while hooping, and you will being to experience wrapping. It is all about understanding where your body and hoop are in space at all times - and - it can make for some very innovative pinch breaks. 

Her lessons were hard both to understand and to attempt. But you know what. I did it. I was tired as hell, drenched in sweat, and dehydrated but I was not afraid. Did I do everything right? Hells. No. But I didn't even worry about failing for one minute and tried everything even though there was a room of people watching. Anxiety did not enter the room. Thank-you hoop. Thank-you - for, in allowing my mind to shut up while inside the hoop, you have allowed me to feel that way even when not inside. 

The next two workshops on Saturday and Sunday had Rich and Khan showing us some truly badass hoop techniques. Rich's precision with creating illusionary spheres always makes me search for the wires that must be assisting him. A super helpful activity was when partners worked together facing each other holding their hoops as a frame, while one moved in a straight line in one direction the other tried to make a perfect isolation in front of them despite the movement. Rich's moves all have a mathematical underpinning to them - which, though beautiful, is not for me. But again, whereas before I would be frustrated by my 'just not getting it' now I was free in my movement and not constrained by the directions. Nothing scary will happen if you break the rules. 

Day four was Khan's turn. Khan brought the shit. The best part? He was so humble and accessible the entire time - showing genuine surprise and humor when the class gasped in awe at one of his new moves. I certainly don't have the language to explain all he taught, and I also think it would be disrespectful to give away something that so many paid and travelled for - but he covered some wonderful moves like the behind the back weave, fish tails and variations on rolls on the arms. 

Out of everything we learned, I think my heart belongs to 'folding.' Folding is where you use all parts of the body as axes around which the hoop bends and twists in folds blending the line between on and off body hooping. It's fast paced and best performed without gripping the hoop. Instead the back of the hand, the wrist and the crooks of the body 'grab' the hoop. This was when I reached a new state of flow. I felt nothing but the movement, in a true state of 'mistakelessness.' And for the first time ever, I realized that those platitudes were not just words for me - I was finally (OH GOD FINALLY) one of those clear-minded, smiley-faced folks that was free to simply experience. 

And this brings me back to my original point. The entire weekend I was overcome with gratitude and joy about getting to fully explore and embrace my passion. "Wow," I thought, "there was a time when I didn't even know how to find my passion, let alone fully explore it." What changed? 

I gave myself time. 

I stopped trying to find "it" and started just living. Stage one - having no freaking clue what I wanted to do. Lots of Netflix and TV and internet futzting. But, this is an important stage! That is where I always freaked out - "Ohmigod I am boring and have no passion gahhhhh!!!" But, for the first time ever, after I quit my job (maybe that was stage one) I just allowed myself to 'be.' Because after the initial joy of not being trapped in something I hated, I naturally found myself looking at certain things, doing certain things and being more open. I was finding my passion. If you are sitting around in an empty room doing nothing, evenutally you will find a way to occupy time - and what you choose should send you a message. There is a reason behind that choice. Could it be passion? 

Hoop Path V was one of the most memorable and best weekends of my life.  In every workshop there is a 'mingle' wherein the entire group moves in a circle hooping together and trying to mirror each other with generous eye contact and connection. I strongly dislike mingles. 

At this stage in my hoop journey, hooping is about connecting to myself not to others - and that's just fine. And that was the real lesson. Whoever you are, whatever you love, where ever you are is okay. You are only responsible for yourself so let the rest go. After Hoop Path V, I realized that I am closer to being in a state of flow in life, and not just in the hoop.  It takes a lot of 'meh' to reach 'ta-da!' and acceptance of that was what I realized I had reached at Hoop Path, and how, I now understand, passion is found. 

Made of Silver and Scarves

I was feeling crafty today. 

I wanted to make something but I have no art materials with me anymore (sad, but true) and unfortunately the closest art store is quite the hike from my house. Not that I can really afford to buy art supplies as I finally bit the bullet and purchased a new computer. (Finally! It's been many years and leg burns and popped off keys.) 

What can I make with no material and no money? I searched through the dark recesses of my closet and found the beautiful silvery scarf that my sister brought me when she was in India and the uh, cheap scarf I bought from my (magical) visit to Target. 

The large scarf from India made a totally serviceable dress when wrapped around me just right and tied with an old black piece of cloth that was hanging with my belts. Perfect on top of my go-to black sports bra and bike shorts. Then I utilized my recent obsession with braids and transformed both scarves into a shimmery hairpiece that I can wear while hooping. I always want to use a scarf as a head wrap while hooping because I think it would look beautiful in motion - but, it actually just gets tangled and tied up just like long hair. Flow no-no. Keeping the scarves braided made it possible to hoop and have my head wrap too. 

Craft day on an uber budget = complete.

New Practice Ideas

I am not an innovator. At least, I don't think so. I know a few folks who always seem to have new bad ass hoop ideas for moves, transitions and tricks and I just - well, don't. Part of this comes from the fact that hooping is more about an emotional connection for me these days - something more akin to the beautiful Shakti Sunfire piece that was posted a bit ago. So I always set an intention before practice - 'what do I want to say in this time?" But hooping doesn't happen only in the mind. I just don't think  I was doing enough to bust out of the rut. I need more in my repertoire to 'say' what I need to say. I couldn't just keep hooping like I always did and hope for a magical change - something new needed to happen. 

Yawn. Hoop practice is so boring when
you don't try anything new.

So, yesterday I took all my energy and did a few things a bit differently when I started my practice. For starters I moved into a new patch of my yard. It's obvious that my landlord is desperately trying to understand why grass won't grow in just one circle out there, so I thought I would throw 'em a bone and mooove over to let the grass have a fighting chance. Being in the same damn place all the time certainly adds to the hoop rut and simply being in a new place added a real freshness to the session. 

Next, I decided to start practice without any music at all. Just explore a few moves I have been trying to learn, but have neglected to polish in my efforts to create flowing hoop videos every single time. I was inspired by yesterday's hoop quotes to let my hoop fall again for a change! By not I was limiting myself to my comfort zone. Comfort zone = hoop rut. So I had to run around the yard more to recapture escaped hoops? Big deal. Not knowing the endpoint of a trick meant I could make it up on the fly.

Working in silence, in a new space, with movement instead of moves made for a much more satisfying and fun practice. I let myself stop and think even though the camera was recording. I kept jumping and turning during standby moves just to see what would happen. It was like a light bulb went off. 'Ohhh this is how innovation happens - trial and error. It's not that people are all more brilliant than I am and come up with perfect moves off the top of their heads!" 

Duh. 

From now on I am going to remember my thoughts about Hoop Path when I practice: I have more than I think to give. Change up a few things. Go somewhere else. Don't worry about the endpoint. Don't worry about how it looks. Just move. Flow. Smile.

Isn't that what makes this so much fun? 

Hoop Path Considerations and Fantasies

I am deleriously excited for Hoop Path 5, which is only two short weeks from today (June 23rd-26th.) I've been to a Hoop Path event before, but never the big time, high rollers event in Carrboro, North Carolina with Bax, Ann, Khan Wong and Rich Porter (to name a few.) I am soooo excited to take my widdle hoop skills and fade into the background while I watch masters at work. The inspiration (and fun) promises to be overwhelming. 

The last time I went to a local Hoop Path event, in December 2009, I was a totally different person. I was soooo nervous to hoop around other hoopers, hoop in a group, hoop without knowing anyone at the event - blah blah blah. This time around I have a hoop buddy going with me (!!!!!!), a few more years of experience under my belt,  and my hoop anxiety is a distant memory. (Honestly, I think I am more comfortable with my hoop than without in almost every situation.) Time, you are an excellent teacher. 

When I first walked into Hoop Path DC in '09 I practiced maybe at the very, very most an hour a day. Usually if I wasn't in the zone, I just stopped - or didn't practice at all. What I learned while hooping in the spacious Hoop Path gym with nothing but hooping on the agenda is that I had so much more to offer of myself than I had ever expected. My mind and body didn't have to be 'in the zone' to have an epic practice and by continuing through slumps I was able to reach a whole new hoop euphoria. For years before the hoop I had tried to become a hardcore runner - someone who reaches a state of bliss after miles and miles logged - and it never happened. (Never. Even. Close. btw, I hate running.) Then, after two, three, four hours of hooping at Hoop Path I realized that I was looking for that feeling in the wrong sport. I had reached a 'runners high' by hooping. I told myself then, if you are ever facing a challenge remember - you can just. keep. going. Set your expectations high - because you can keep going and you will reach your goals.

6. hoop. a lot. 

It was the first time I really felt a 'hoop high.' My practice from that point was transformed. Yes, I learned some great techniques, moves, tricks, and transitions during the event - but learning how much I truly had to give was the lesson that really stuck. 

Of course, Hoop Path won't all be nebulous lessons and deep thoughts. It promises to also be an uber blast with hoop jams, bon fires and pool parties (and lots of wine...at least for me.) Who knows what all it shall bring. Many photos, videos and musings for sure.

I can't wait. 

(Hells. Yes!)

Vicarious Living

I have to move in a couple months and a primary factor in any decision will be what kind of hoop space an apartment has. A realistic budget precludes anything like the following open space dream worlds - but, I hope to at least get white walls, big windows and a sizable living room. 

I've never had a consistent indoor space to hoop that wasn't terrible for the job. I am sure I'm not alone. For now, I will dream of indoor hoop sessions with natural light streaming in and not one crash into intrusive furniture, ceilings or walls. Ah, dreamy.

The first and last are definitely my favorite. I like things that look sparse rather than fancy. When I first moved into my current apartment I went the first 6 months with only one camping chair as the sum total of my furniture so that I could maximize my hoop space. It was terrible for entertaining, but oh how I miss being able to spin all around the apartment unimpeded 

all images via tumblr

Tell A Story: Kathak Inspiration

Inspired by yesterday's intention to emotionally connect with the music during my hoop practice, today I looked up information about dances that serve as story telling tools. My search brought me to kathak dance, a form of Indian classical dance in which gestures and expressions are used during stylized performances to recount a mythological or moral tale. 

Facial expression seems to be an incredibly important tool when dancing in this style. So often when I hoop I get caught up thinking about my body, my limbs, the external moving parts - and forget about the most expressive tool a human has - my face. Whether I drop into 'grumpy hoop face' or 'new trick face' I usually have a hard time even remembering to smile when I hoop, let alone convey story telling emotions throughout. I love finding other forms of art or movement and thinking, "hmm maybe I can use that..." and with my next practice I will try and put the story into both my movement and my face. 

All these little tools that I have been stumbling upon - the 3 words to describe the practice, thinking of the hoop as a partner, and now conveying a story in both my face and movements - really add something to the practice. Even though at the end of most first trials with something new I am left with a video that is only about halfway there, and usually ...well, sorta awkward, these tools still help to keep me motivated and excited to practice. They really encourage growth in a new way, without having to study endless YouTube videos trying to find a new 'trick.' In a few more practices, who knows what I will keep or where it will go.

Finding a hoop identity sure does feel good, though.

Moving Beyond Physical Exploration in (my) Hoop Practice

I thought of a new word for my three words to describe my hooping: emotional. 

I am a very emotional person. Ugh. Oh how I have fought that fact forever. I always wanted to be one of the 'cool' girls - hardened, jaded, and good at things like pool and changing a tire. Well. I can't change a tire, am an embarrassment to myself and others when playing pool and have found that being jaded is only a thin veil for what usually turns out to be a very emotional person after all - so I may as well embrace reality, yes? 

This past week away was wonderful - but, as travel can be - it was also stressful and exhaustive. My body was very ready to release the tension of the week with an intense practice, but I knew that after so much time of only periodic hooping my body was also not ready for a physically strenuous practice.

Inspired by Shannon's blog about the difference between a hooper and a hoop dancer, I set an intention to think of the hoop as a partner during my practice session. I danced to Regina Spektor's (yes, I am on a real kick with her) Chemo Limo about a mother who is dying of cancer and has a dream that it magically goes away and she is able to take care of her four young children instead of dying due to an inability - and mocking unwillingness - to pay for treatment. 

As I listened to the song I envisioned being the mother and thinking of her reactions as she rides along in the limo she rents as a last hurrah of a stylish lifestyle that she will never have. She angrily thinks about how she would rather pay for the limo than stupid chemotherapy, which is failing to save her, costing an exorbitant fee and making her unable to care for her children. On the aimless ride in the car she watches her four children. The song makes the emotional connection easy. The vivid descriptions of the children's nuanced behaviors throughout the ride hint at the mother's attempt to cling to what is happening now because she realizes that there may not be much more. It was an intense practice, indeed.

I found a wonderful outlet for my enjoyment of emotional exploration by incorporating it into my hoop practice. So much easier than learning to change a tire.

As I progress I am trying to move beyond physical progress and delve more deeply into emotional and mental exploration. I am trying to fully embrace what I can bring to my practice that is specific to me instead of an imitation of someone else.

So...that whole...not being an emotional person thing? Not really working out. But that whole stress release thing? Totally got it.

Life's Top Regrets

This list of the top regrets elder care nurse Bonnie Ware heard over her many years working with dying patients and her thoughts on such regrets. It inspired me to continue living a life of passion rather than one of safety.   

What things do I do, say, own, and feel in my current life that I think will continue to be of value at the very end? Those are the things to which I must  gravitate and ground myself in. Of course - no one knows what experiences life will bring nor how they will feel at the end, but this list helps me to be less afraid of being afraid every once in awhile.

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. 

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it. 

2. I wish I didn't work so hard. 

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. 

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings. 

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result. We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly,in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. 

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. 

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip.But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks,love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have sillyness in their life again. 

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again,long before you are dying.